Sweatin’ the Small Stuff

Probably TMI but I can’t remember the last time I actually sweated under my arms.  I actually think its been over 5 years or more.  Ever since I switched to the over the counter prescription strength antiperspirants underarm sweat and odor have been a thing of the past.  I can even go a day without wearing an antiperspirant and remain shower fresh.

On the surface that sounds great!  I no longer fear hot weather, those embarrassing sweat rings on shirts and dresses, and I no longer have to worry about embarrassing odors in social situations.  The down side is that this is completely abnormal.  I mean I should sweat a little bit when it is 100F outside shouldn’t I?  It doesn’t feel right to me no matter how convenient it is to be perspiration free.

A couple of weeks ago I ran out of my antiperspirant.  It was no biggy the first day or the second day.  A little rubbing alcohol under my arms after my shower in the morning was enough to keep me fresh all day.  But day three completely unnerved me.  Not because I was sweating but because of the horrible stench that seemed to seep out of my pores.   I was trying to figure out where that unearthly stench was coming from and it was me!  It didn’t smell like normal sweat-it smelled like some hot putrid burned body funk that I could never imagine.  I had barely started to perspire and I was stinking up my work area.  I rushed off to the bathroom to clean up and promptly went to buy the deodorant I had put off buying for the past 3 days.

The stink crisis was over but I was still bothered by the way using that antiperspirant had altered my body chemistry to create a funk that rivaled any BO I had ever smelled before.  I didn’t and still don’t like it.  I want to seriously reduce my dependence on the high potency antiperspirant I have been using and switch to a more natural deodorant.  I did a clay underarm detox yesterday and bought 2 scents of Tom’s natural deodorant.  I do know going in I will have to freshen up several times a day.  My plan is to try several types and scents of natural deodorants over the next few months and find one that works best for me.  If anyone has any suggestions let me know!

Still Here!

Life has been crazy! Things have been crazy at work. I had an out of town wedding to attend this last weekend. (I managed to fit into the dress-go me!). I will do better updating this blog starting this week. But first I need to unpack and put out some fires at work.

I’m still intermittent fasting. I’ll try to do a update on that very soon. It’s working for me pretty well and I am thinking of doing a 19/5 fast to get the last few pounds off. I can’t wait to get back to my routine after the last few weeks I’ve had!

How is it Possible?

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I have a wedding to go to in just 3 short weeks. Flashback-when I brought the dress a little over a month ago I was about 8 lbs heavier. It fit quite nicely. The only complaint I had about it was that my stomach wasn’t quite where I wanted it to be. All in all any issues I had with the dress could be fixed by a spanx slip. A month ago I was sure that all I would need to do this close to the wedding would be to find some shoes to go along with the dress I purchased.
Fast forward to yesterday evening when I decided to try on the dress to see how much “better” it would fit. The dress was looser in the chest, arms, and waist. But somehow I seems that I have lost weight in all the wrong areas. My smaller waist made the dress seem baggy but I still had a bit of a pooch in the stomach area. I’m not even sure how that happened. It’s like the dress looked better with more stomach to fill it out?! Then the dress fell weird on in the thigh area-but my thighs have definitely gotten smaller as per my jeans. I’m at a loss. Either I need to lose another 5 lbs before the event so the dress hangs more like a shift dress or I need to find something else to wear. I can’t figure out how it is possible to lose weight in all the wrong places but I did it.
This is the part of my weight loss journey that is driving me nuts. None of my clothes fit quite right. Everything is baggy in the waist and butt but too tight to go down a size in the thigh/hip area. My tops don’t fit quite right either. I am probably between a sizes and that doesn’t help. Until then I will have to keep making things work I guess.

IF

I’m still having an issue with emotional eating. I am also dealing with the bone numbing fatigue that comes with a RA flare-which means I eat mindlessly for “energy”. I just want to maintain the progress that I’ve worked so hard to achieve. I’ve decided to try intermittent fasting (IF) to control my desire to shove food in my face 24/7.

Since my goal is to prevent over eating rather than rapid weight loss I’ve chosen to place my eating window from 9 am to 5 pm. I will still walk in the morning for about 35 minuets to get my fasting “workout”. Hopefully next week I will see 0 weight gain-which will be a victory for me.

Me verses the Wall

I am trying to drink more water. I have jumped onto the drink half your weight in water train and I am riding it for all it’s worth. Positives-my skin is more hydrated and I have noticed an increase in my energy levels. The down side-having to pee 20 times throughout the night.

Last night I was determined not to wake up for the 18th time to trudge to the bathroom. I was trying to remain “sleep” despite having to get out of bed. That strategy worked well until I walked into the doorframe of the bathroom.

So I’ve been sporting a lovely bruise right between my eyes. It’s still sore to touch and I’ve had a slight headache all day. But I still did my 30 minute walk this morning before work and I’m still drinking my water today. So I guess I won ?

Note to Self-Meal Prep

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I know that weight loss is 80% of what you eat.  I also know that good health relies heavily how you fuel your body.  But over and over again I plan to grab something “healthy” on the run.  Even though 9 out of 10 times that doesn’t happen. The sad thing is I don’t intend to make  poor choices.  More and more I am finding that I eat unhealthily because there are no healthy choices available to me.

My cafeteria at work will advertise vegetables but then season them with bacon or ham.  So the one thing a non-meat eater can always count on instantly becomes uneatable.  Then I look at the entrees: meat, meat, or  mac’n cheese.  All poor choices for me.  So I am left grabbing a bag of chips, crackers, or a KIND bar.  Great!  The poor  breakfast and lunch choices lead to ravenous hunger after work and me opting for something quick rather than something nutritious.

I need to get it through my head that this is insanity.  Everyday I go to the company cafeteria expecting choices and most days I am disappointed.  I need to start bringing my breakfast and lunch.  I need to start meal prepping on the weekend.  Because it doesn’t matter if I wake up early every morning before work and walk.  It doesn’t matter if I track my calories religiously.  I cannot get healthy if I don’t take control of my diet.  So this weekend I will plan out a menu.  I will prep my meals.  I will making the same choice over and over again and expecting a different result.

Doing Something

After last nights weight loss meeting I was feeling reinvigorated.  I had my goal for the week, I had learned some nutrition tips, and I was more determined than ever to do the hard work necessary to change my lifestyle.  Then morning happened.

I woke up with a horrible sinus headache.  I also discovered that the stomach bug that had been circling around my department at work had decided it was my turn for the nauseous fun everyone else had been experiencing.  My healthy eating plans went out the window.  Instead of the barbecue tofu and vegetables I had planned to make for dinner tonight I opted for soup.  On top of all of this my RA decided to join the party!  If any day was to be a complete wash out today should have been the day.  My own body seemed to be conspiring against me to derail my healthy journey today.

I had decided to make an early night of it.  I had already put on my PJs.  The bed was turned down.  The new plan was to mindlessly watch tv until I fell asleep.  But I paused, dropped to the floor, and did 10 push ups.  No it wasn’t a calorie blasting workout.  However it was SOMETHING.  It was me saying to life’s inevitable downs that my health is a priority.  When I can do more I will.  But sometimes it will just be something-and I am fine with that.

It’s OK to Get Help

 

I’m not ashamed to admit that I need help on my health journey.  I took a good long honest look at myself, at my issues with my weight, and my relationship with food.  The only conclusion was that I needed help.  And I still need help.  Everyday I fight to continue to go forward and not re-gain the small victories I have achieved.  I am at a point in my journey where it is getting difficult.  I want to settle for better instead of struggling for health.  So I went to a weight loss support group tonight.  Just to get back on track.  I needed to  hear that I’m not the only one who struggles.  I needed to be reminded of what I am trying to achieve and to recommit myself to being the healthiest version of myself.  Because I is ok to get help.  There is no shame in needing support.  All that matters is that I make my goal.  And with help, I am sure I can be the healthiest I can be.

Food Guilt

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If I had to choose one word to describe how I have felt about my diet over the past few years it would be GUILT. I felt guilty over my food choices and guilty over my portion sizes. I felt guilty that I was just grabbing fast food, and most of all guilty of the way my poor choices were harming my body. I knew my family history of obesity, high blood pressure, and diabetes. But I still chose to eat foods that would make it hard to escape my genetic predispositions. I also have my own health issues to deal with. I have rheumatoid arthritis-an autoimmune disease. Eating a diet of high fat, high meat, low fruits and vegetables did nothing to alleviate the symptoms of this painful disease. In fact, my poor diet probably made my efforts to achieve remission of my disease harder. The foods I was eating on the regular basis were highly inflammatory- the last thing I needed.
I have made small changes over the last few months. I’ve given up red meat and poultry. Even though I’m still adjusting to a pescatarian diet I can say that I feel better giving up some of the inflammatory foods in my diet. I’m not a big seafood person but I am trying to get used to consuming fish on the regular basis for the anti-inflammatory benefit they provide. I am slowly increasing the amounts of fruits and vegetables I consume.
Do I still crave the unhealthy foods that I spent so many years eating? Yes. My mind still sees the unhealthy foods as I was consuming on the regular basis as familiar. When I try to plan my meals burgers, fries, pizza (which I still eat a few times a month) are the first things to come to mind. The fact that you can easily get vegetarian versions of these foods doesn’t make it any easier. But what is helping is that when I eat healthier the guilty feelings are not present. And when I fall off the wagon and decide that a veggie burger and fries is the best I can do for dinner I accept that. I am making healthier choices than I was before. I’m choosing to focus on progress rather than perfection. Lifestyle changes don’t happen overnight but I have a new determination to practice doing things differently. I am changing my relationship with food so that guilt isn’t in the equation-even when I “mess” up.

Adventures in Tofu

For most of my life tofu has fallen into 2 categories. The first category was tofu that I would take one bite of and then move around on my plate until it was safe to throw away. And then there was tofu that I would find tolerable. Tolerable tofu meant I would eat 5 or 6 bites before moving it around on my plate and ultimately throw it out. But I kept ordering it, trying tofu at different functions and restaurants because it is a great source of protein and so many people love tofu. I was convinced that I just hadn’t had it prepared in a way that I would like.
I was proven right when I had sliced tofu in a soup. I finally was able to see how tofu was able to transform itself and take on the flavor of whatever you seasoned it. Each slice of tofu was infused with the broth. I was surprised to find myself searching out the tofu in the soup. That was the first dish prepared with tofu where I wasn’t looking to get rid of it.
The next time I had tofu that I enjoyed was at a Chinese restaurant. The tofu was smothered in a sauce giving it even more flavor than the tofu I liked in the soup. The tofu had been cubed and fried in a way that gave the outside a bit of a crunch with a tender center. I loved every bite of it!
So today I decided to buy tofu to fix it for myself for the first time ever. The whole thing seemed overwhelming-silken, firm, extra firm. I honestly only know that extra firm was for preparing it like a meat substitute and silken tofu was good for smoothies. You can see why most of my previous tofu adventures involved eating tofu someone else had prepared. I honestly have no idea of where to start with preparing tofu. I took the easy way out and grabbed the silken tofu (I also had no idea what brand to get so I went with the no GMO one) some almond milk and went home. I had heard that using silken protein in a smoothie was a great way to add protein without resorting to protein powders.
I had no real recipe, so I freestyled it. I used 3.2 oz of silken tofu, frozen fruit, and added almond milk. The smoothie ended up being thicker than I wanted it to be. I could have added more milk but I the size of the smoothie ended up being way more than the 8 oz snack I wanted so I just dealt with it. Most importantly the tofu didn’t affect the taste of my concoction. I was a healthy snack packed with fruit and protein that did not bother my stomach! I need to work on my recipe a little but all in all silken tofu in a smoothie is a keeper for me. Maybe next week I’ll try to cooking with tofu!

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